I grew up hearing my dad’s stories about his childhood. How he’d lost his mother at 12 in a car accident, and moved with his younger brother and sister to his grandparent’s house where they were finishing up raising 15 children of their own. I was always very interested in the details of his childhood mostly, I think, because he lived a childhood that most kids fear. These stories translated in my child’s mind into black and white snapshots.
Driving back to see the house where they grew up after their mother was killed; I finally saw these memories in their full color.
On the trip my dad revealed a few details that he’d left out of his narrative to me as a young girl. Now, as a mother myself, his childhood came into full color in my mind. In the car I sat beside my own son, close to the age my grandmother was when she died. I thought about what it must have been like for my 12 year old father to come here as an orphan. I wanted to travel back in time as the mother I am now to those 3 children who so desperately needed a warm place to fall. I saw this story for the first time as a mother, as his mother who, without a choice, was forced to leave her 3 children to fend for themselves. As a mother I feel the pride that my grandmother would feel to see that her son grew up to be such a wonderful human being.
I know my father has experienced loss in his life. I also know that without loss, you’re unable to really see the beauty of life. Life must be poignantly beautiful for him at times and for that I am grateful.
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Beautiful post. Amazing how being a mother affects your perspective.
Posted by: Jaime @ A Place Out West | July 28, 2009 at 05:09 PM
I can't imagine the dignity and patience of living in those years.
You wrote about your story in it beautifully.
Posted by: deb@talkatthetable | July 28, 2009 at 07:01 PM
Wow.
Posted by: Rebekah | July 28, 2009 at 10:03 PM
This is a wonderful post. Thank you for sharing it. :)
Posted by: Erin | July 29, 2009 at 10:54 AM
What a wonderful post! I love the metaphor of imagining your father's world in black and white, and the rush of feeling when it translates to color. So beautiful. Thank you :)
Posted by: Sharone | July 30, 2009 at 05:33 PM